{"id":8471,"date":"2023-07-31T09:09:31","date_gmt":"2023-07-31T09:09:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/?p=8471"},"modified":"2025-10-04T11:21:51","modified_gmt":"2025-10-04T11:21:51","slug":"with-my-heart-on-the-outside","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/2023\/07\/with-my-heart-on-the-outside\/","title":{"rendered":"Cu inima pe-afar\u0103!"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Antoine de Saint Exupery spune \u00een cartea sa: \u201eMicul Prin\u021b\u201d, c\u0103 \u201enu po\u021bi vedea bine dec\u00e2t cu inima\u201d, eu a\u0219 accentua pu\u021bin \u0219i a\u0219 \u00eendr\u0103zni s\u0103 spun chiar \u201ebine nu po\u021bi tr\u0103i dec\u00e2t cu inima\u201d, cel pu\u021bin eu. \u0218i \u0219tiu precis, sunt momentele acelea, c\u00e2nd inima parc\u0103 ar sparge pieptul \u0219i ar zbura sus, ar colinda p\u0103m\u00e2ntul cu toate frumuse\u021bile lui \u0219i le-ar \u00eembr\u0103\u021bi\u0219a. Pentru ca mai apoi, s\u0103 se poat\u0103 odihni cu recuno\u0219tin\u021b\u0103 la picioarele unei icoane calde. In acele clipe mi-a\u0219 dori s\u0103 pot tr\u0103i nu \u00een trup, ci \u00een inim\u0103, s\u0103 pot fi doar inim\u0103...\u0218i mai sunt \u0219i alte momente, c\u00e2nd mai mult dec\u00e2t orice, devin o inim\u0103 cu ceilal\u021bi. Atunci am acest sentiment c\u0103 to\u021bi avem un col\u021b al ei legat de al celuilalt, prin cea mai fin\u0103 \u0219i delicat\u0103 panglic\u0103, dragostea lui Dumnezeu.<\/p>\n

\u00cenchid ochii \u0219i cobor acolo, \u00een inim\u0103, la una dintre cele mai dragi amintiri ale purt\u0103rii ei pe-afar\u0103. \u0218i se vedea, sigur c\u0103 se vedea, nu ro\u0219ie \u0219i uniform\u0103 ca \u00een picturi, ci prin lacrimi, z\u00e2mbet \u0219i ochi str\u0103lucitori.<\/p>\n

Aniversarea de 23 de ani am hot\u0103r\u00e2t s\u0103 mi-o petrec \u00een col\u021bul st\u00e2ng al pieptului. De altfel, \u0219tiu c\u0103 a\u0219a \u0219i spuneam: \u201eanul acesta vreau s\u0103 m\u0103 s\u0103rb\u0103toresc \u00eentr-un loc apropiat sufletului\u201d. S\u0103 m\u0103 simt cu adev\u0103rat acas\u0103, acasa inimii. \u0218i sigur, alegerea nu a fost grea, M\u0103n\u0103stirea Putna.<\/p>\n

A\u0219a c\u0103, \u00een prima zi a prim\u0103verii, am pornit spre sf\u00e2ntul l\u0103ca\u0219. Inima tr\u0103ia la unison cu \u00eenceputul de anotimp. Martie lupta cu iarna, eu cu un amalgam de sentimente. Era bucurie, era \u0219i necunoscut, c\u0103ci nu st\u0103tusem mai mult de o zi la m\u0103n\u0103stire, iar ziua de na\u0219tere cu at\u00e2t mai pu\u021bin o celebrasem \u00eentr-un astfel de loc. Era suflet, dar era \u0219i trup. \u00cens\u0103 drumul at\u00e2t de lung p\u00e2n\u0103 la Putna a fost mereu a\u0219a, imposibil de parcurs f\u0103r\u0103 inim\u0103, f\u0103r\u0103 toat\u0103 inima.<\/p>\n

Era \u00eenceputul Postului Mare. Am ajuns pe \u00eentuneric. T\u0103cere \u00een orice cotlon al m\u0103n\u0103stirii. Ca \u0219i cum tot zumzetul vie\u021bii cotidiene se retr\u0103sese undeva, ascuns, obosit. Aveam s\u0103 aflu pu\u021bin mai t\u00e2rziu unde. De\u0219i venisem cu mult dor, \u00een fa\u021ba acestui cadru diferit de ce tr\u0103iam zilnic, o ap\u0103sare m-a cuprins. Era prea mult\u0103 lini\u0219te, puteam s\u0103 aud ce m\u0103 doare, era prea mult\u0103 lips\u0103 a lucrurilor materiale cu care m\u0103 pricepeam at\u00e2t de bine s\u0103 acop\u0103r anumite neajunsuri \u0219i sigur, bucuria nu mai putea fi g\u0103sit\u0103 nicidecum \u00een cele exterioare. Ziua mea de na\u0219tere avea s\u0103 fie \u00een c\u00e2teva zile, dar m\u0103 sim\u021beam at\u00e2t de slab\u0103, de cople\u0219it\u0103, \u00eenc\u00e2t m\u0103 \u00eentrebam dac\u0103 voi rezista. Fiind \u00eenceputul Postului Mare, slujbele erau mult mai lungi, nevoin\u021bele ceva mai aspre, frigul \u00eenc\u0103 \u00een for\u021b\u0103. \u00cemi sim\u021beam inima un c\u00e2mp de lupt\u0103. Pe de-o parte, via\u021ba distinct\u0103 de aici care m\u0103 cople\u0219ea, pe de alt\u0103 partea, acea intui\u021bie a bucuriei adev\u0103rate.<\/p>\n

A\u0219a c\u0103 inima mea s-a retras, pieptul \u00eemi era iar\u0103\u0219i mic, tr\u0103irea din nou firav\u0103. Doar c\u00e2nd \u0219i c\u00e2nd, \u00een timpul slujbelor, se f\u0103cea iar\u0103\u0219i sim\u021bit\u0103. \u0218i \u00een fa\u021ba oboselii care m\u0103 cuprindea at\u00e2t de puternic, ea st\u0103tea ferm\u0103, implor\u00e2ndu-m\u0103 parc\u0103 s\u0103 r\u0103m\u00e2n. \u00cemi ar\u0103ta cu degetul ar\u0103t\u0103tor, a\u0219a cum fac copiii c\u00e2nd v\u0103d ceva care \u00eei \u00eenc\u00e2nt\u0103, \u00eencerc\u00e2nd s\u0103 \u00eemi descopere frumuse\u021bea de care m\u0103 \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219eam. Cu fiecare rug\u0103ciune inima se ridica, cu fiecare \u00een\u0103l\u021bare de pleoap\u0103 c\u0103tre Sus, \u00een\u021belegea, cu orice plecare de genunchi se lini\u0219tea. O lume nou\u0103 se ridica discret \u00eenaintea ochilor ei. \u00cencepeam s\u0103 \u00een\u021beleg ce acoperea t\u0103cerea m\u0103n\u0103stirii. Lumea \u00eentreag\u0103 era retras\u0103 \u00een fiecare bob de metanie \u0219i ren\u0103scut\u0103 prin rug\u0103ciune. Iar inima mea din ce \u00een ce mai mult pe-afar\u0103. Mi se scurgea adesea pe obraji, c\u00e2nta uneori cu putere \u00een stran\u0103, mul\u021bumea f\u0103r\u0103 \u00eencetare \u0219i devenea \u00een unele momente, u\u0219oar\u0103 ca un fulg. Nu cuno\u0219team prea mul\u021bi oameni acolo, nu fusesem foarte des, \u00eens\u0103 exista o comuniune minunat\u0103, pe care nu a\u0219 putea s\u0103 o explic. Ceva din inima fiec\u0103ruia exista \u00een a celuilalt. Nu aveam toat\u0103 familia l\u00e2ng\u0103 mine, dar sim\u021beam iubire, nu aveam lucruri str\u0103lucitoare, dar vedeam lumin\u0103 \u0219i poate cel mai important, nu avem bucurie, ci eram bucurie.<\/p>\n

Cele c\u00e2teva zile s-au scurs cu aceast\u0103 \u00eencercare neostenit\u0103 a inimii de a-i deveni m\u0103car pentru pu\u021bin timp, ea, cas\u0103 trupului. Iar eu parc\u0103 o tot \u00eencurajam \u0219optindu-i rar \u0219i des versurile Aurei Christi: \u201eRidic\u0103-\u021bi trupul,\/ia-l \u00een bra\u021be \u2013 u\u0219or,\/\u00eencet, ca pe un prunc\u201d. Treptat, toat\u0103 lipsa de comoditate, tot greul ce mi s-a ridicat \u00eenainte la \u00eenceput, devenea prilej ca ea s\u0103 \u00ee\u0219i fac\u0103 din ce \u00een ce mai mult loc spre exterior. S\u0103 tr\u0103iasc\u0103 a\u0219a cum a fost l\u0103sat\u0103 \u0219i pentru ce a fost l\u0103sat\u0103...liber\u0103, \u00een libertatea cea bun\u0103.<\/p>\n

Acea aniversare a fost un dar...Inima izb\u00e2ndise! \u0218i-a f\u0103cut loc prin lut, ie\u0219ind la suprafa\u021b\u0103. \u0218i vai, cum se vedea! Nu am avut petrecere, nici parte de cele f\u0103r\u0103 de care credeam c\u0103 nu m\u0103 pot sim\u021bi s\u0103rb\u0103torit\u0103, \u00eens\u0103 am primit daruri statornice. Mai \u00eent\u00e2i oamenii...Pentru c\u0103 at\u00e2t de mult\u0103 iubire am sim\u021bit atunci, \u00eenc\u00e2t m-am convins iar\u0103\u0219i ce binecuv\u00e2ntare putem fi adesea unii pentru al\u021bii. \u0218i mai apoi, bucuria simplit\u0103\u021bii. Inima lep\u0103dase, chiar dac\u0103 pentru un timp scurt, cele moderne, lucioase \u0219i tr\u0103ise pacea unei c\u0103m\u0103\u0219i din p\u00e2nz\u0103 topit\u0103, ca a str\u0103bunilor no\u0219tri. St\u0103tea tihnit\u0103 la poarta trupului, cu m\u00e2inile t\u0103cut \u00eempreunate \u0219i nu striga, nu vorbea tare, ci doar t\u0103cea \u0219i z\u00e2mbea cald, at\u00e2t de cald, c\u0103 pentru o clip\u0103 mi-a amintit de icoana bunicilor no\u0219tri sfio\u0219i, dar curajo\u0219i.<\/p>\n

A\u0219a mi-am purtat \u00een acele zile inima pe afar\u0103, prin \u00een\u021belegerea pe care a dob\u00e2ndit-o. Greul celor c\u00e2teva zile meritase din plin! F\u0103r\u0103 el nu \u0219tiu dac\u0103 puteam s\u0103 \u00een\u021beleg sensul efortului, bucuria simplit\u0103\u021bii \u0219i marea binecuv\u00e2ntare a panglicii cu care Tat\u0103l ceresc ne leag\u0103 inimile, iubirea. Ast\u0103zi, cred cu t\u0103rie c\u0103 fericit po\u021bi fi tr\u0103ind mai mult cu inima, cel pu\u021bin eu! Doamne ajut\u0103 ca acele zile s\u0103 fie tot mai multe!<\/p>\n

Mihaela<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Antoine de Saint Exupery says in his book, \u201cThe Little Prince\u201d, that \u201cyou cannot see clearly except with your heart,\u201d and I would take this further and dare to say even that \u201cyou cannot live well except with your heart,\u201d at least for me. And I know precisely, there are those moments when my heart […]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[80],"tags":[29],"class_list":["post-8471","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-icon-from-within-jul-aug-23","tag-youth-voice","entry"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8471","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8471"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8471\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8475,"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8471\/revisions\/8475"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8471"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8471"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sfdumitru.org\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8471"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}